Live a happy life :)

"Just open your eyes, And see that life is beautiful."

((Life is Beautiful by Sixx AM))

For psychology this year, my mom has me reading this book called Sacred Contracts: Awakening Your Divine Potential (written by Caroline Myss). In the book she explains each one of us has our own contract, which would also be known as your purpose in life. In the inside front flap of her book she explains what a contract is. "Sacred Contract: What you and only you are here on earth to do."

Within our contracts, we have twelve primary archetypes and eight secondary ones. Archetypes are like our spiritual energies, the gatekeepers of your higher purpose. We use them to help us find out what we are here on earth to learn and whom we are meant to meet. "In coming to know your archetypal companions, you also begin to see how to live your life in ways that make the best use of your personal power and lead you to fulfill your greatest, in fact, your divine, potential."

I'm all about trying to find out what it is I'm here to do on this earth. I want to be able to live a happy, meaningful life and this book is helping me get a nice head-start early on. Like all things in life, things should be balanced. What comes to mind is Yin & Yang, positive and negative, hot and cold. Without the balance though, we become extremist. Doing too much of one thing or the other. With the archetypes, and everything else in life, there is a light side and a shadow aspect to them.

While trying to figure out my personal archetypes, I realized that "Rebel" was one of my twelve primary's. Typically, people look down on someone who would classify themselves a rebel, but in this case, I don't think it's such a bad thing.

For an example, I'm a rebel in the sense that I want to go against the "status quo" way of life. I want to be myself, be different and I'm not afraid to be. The stressful life's first step is having to graduate high school. Pretty easy right? Eh...not really. Most of us, barely knowing who we truly are and what we want to do, are being forced to figure out what we want to do the rest of our lives while still in high school.

The next step is we absolutely have to go college. If you don't go to college you're going to be a failure (that's what a lot of people have said to me personally, anyway). We pay, more like our parents do if they can, all that money when we're not even sure about what we want to do the rest of our life. Then it goes to working a full time job you really hate, but you do it because it pays good. You have to worry about paying off that new shiny car, and all these bills. It's of that is unneeded stress to me. Yes, there's a lot of people who do amazing with all that. Then, there's people like me who just want to live life simply.

I look around and see that not too many people can honestly say they're truly happy with how things are going in life. There's always a small, or for others large, list of things that are going wrong and that is causing them some amount of stress. I've written about it before, and I'm doing it again; you don't need to go to college to be successful in life. Yes, college is a good thing, but guess what? It's not for everyone. Yes, Having a good paying job is great, but not if it makes you miserable. Our goal in life is to be happy, right? So why are we doing everything like Dan, or Jill?

Going back to archetypes, the rebel for me is looking at things outside of the box, being open minded, doing things purposely against the status quo so I can show people that you don't have to be like Caitlin or Josh to be happy. You can be who you are and do what you want to do. Every single one of us is different. So why is the school system, and pretty much everyone else categorizing us as the same person with the same wants and needs?

Something that came into my head while thinking of this, was the Disney movie "Tarzan". It's always been one of my favorites, always will be. What I realized this morning is, like in any good Disney movie or life experience, there is always something you can learn.

Let me break it down for you. In the movie Tarzan, Kerjack yells at Kala saying that he will never be one of them, that he's too different. Tarzan runs off, questioning why he can't be accepted into the family, why he's so different. He gets so mad he slaps the water and mud hits his face. When this happens he realizes that he kind of looks like the others with the mud and decides to put it all over him.

Now, the way I look at this is Kerjack is the majority of people. Basically saying he doesn't fit in because he looks different, he acts different, everything about him is different and so that is going against the status quo, or what he's used to. Tarzan, would be the people who just want to be accepted, so they "put mud all over them" to fit in better. So they wont be looked down upon anymore. The story continues...

Kala comes to Tarzan and sees that he's covered in mud. She asks what he's doing and Tarzan replied, "Kerjack says I'm too different, that I can never be apart of the family." Well, obviously, Kala wouldn't accept that so she points out to him that, like the apes, he has two eyes, a nose, and hands. She then brings him to her chest and has him listen to her heart, after she has Tarzan put his hand to his chest and asked him what he felt. "My heart" he said.

Kala, acting as the mother, is looking at her child and seeing that he's not embracing the fact that he's different. He's trying to basically get rid of who he is so he can be accepted into the family. Thankfully, she wont allow that. She knows her child is amazing just the way he is and it hurts her to see that he's trying to push his true self away. That's when Kala shows him just how similar they really are.....

Kala explained to him that we might all be different on the outside, but on the inside we're all the same. She's right too. On the outside, everyone looks different. We all have different views on life, different personalities, different likes and dislikes. But on the inside, we're all the same.

As my mother says about her own life, "I define success as having happiness, peace, and love in my life. It's not about money, address, the kind of car I drive, or any other kind of material possession. It's about waking up every morning and being content with who and where I am. What's right for you may not produce the same results in my life and what's right for me may not produce the same results in your life. That's why it's so important that we not impose our ideas of success in a judgmental way on others. We should love and accept everyone for who they are without judgement."

So to finish all of this. Through the book I'm reading, the things I've learned, the people in my life and experiences I've had, I'm being able to better enjoy my life and understand what's right for me. I'm doing what I want to do and not trying to live up to everyones expectations or live the life they planned for me. But instead, live the life that I've planned for me. One that is simple and happy. I'm hoping you all can do the same too :)

They will always be in our hearts

"You're in the arms of an Angel; May you find some comfort here...."

I thought I'd take the time out to recognize a day that I feel is really important to pay attention to. Today is national pregnancy and infant loss awareness day. I personally know some people who have had a miscarriage or have lost their new baby after being born. It's really hard for me when I hear that someone has lost a loved one no matter how old, but it's a little more difficult for me when I hear that a little baby wasn't able to even make it out of the womb.

I strongly believe everything happens for a reason and as I've always said, out of everything bad something good happens and vise versa. For the ones who have left us, though they did not live long, or maybe not at all, they definitely have impacted us greatly in so many ways. May God watch over all of those who has lost a child in and out of the womb and for all of the little ones who have passed, rest in peace♥

((Quote on top is from Angel by Sarah McLachlan))

Paper I wrote for psychology o:

Inferiority Complex

“People with inferiority complexes believe that they are not as worthy or skilled as their peers, which can cause considerable psychological distress, whether or not they are aware of these feelings on a conscious level.”

From what I've read, inferiority complexes begin at a young age. No matter how old you are, everyone wants to fit in and feel accepted among their peers. Sadly, this can be an extremely hard thing to do. People young and old are very judgmental and critical towards others and some enjoy making it known.

As a kid, you knew these people to be bullies. Those who make fun of or torture someone to make them feel better about themselves. They'll start picking on you because you have less money then most, have a different skin tone, are from a different culture or practice a different religion. Possibly, it's because of how you dress or because you aren't classified as the coolest person around.

This will start causing you to feel absolutely horrible about who you are. A lot of kids who have been bullied, from what I've noticed, can turn out to be the quiet kid no one really talks to. They become extremely shy, self-conscious, and possibly even paranoid. They fear humiliation because they've already gone through more then enough of it, so they try and be distant from others. Some can also become the new bully around town, feeling like they have to cause others the same pain they went through.

Other causes could be from family. For example, say you have a younger sibling who, from babyhood, would always steal the spotlight. You feel that your parents are giving them all of the attention in the world and decide to just completely ignore you. Or maybe it's an older sibling you have that you're constantly being compared to. Either way, soon enough you will then begin to feel unwanted, unloved, misunderstood, and invisible to those around you.

You'll push it off as much as possible, but soon enough you just can't help but to give in and accept those things. That's when you'll begin to resent your younger sister or brother for being “better then you”. You'll also start having resentment towards your parents for acting like they never care, and then resentment towards yourself for not being “good enough” for them. This can be the case for a lot of people out there who have younger and older siblings.

Once someone has been through something that will help develop a sense of feeling inferior, it can sometimes be hard to get rid of. Most people are able to grow out of it and continue on with their lives. Others though can have some problems with letting it go. Inferiority complexes are usually unconscious so typically people don't know that they have it or even what it is.

They say that identifying an inferiority complex can be tricky. “People who experience feelings of inadequacy, feel like they have difficulty in social situations, or actively sabotage themselves may benefit from psychotherapy to determine whether or not they have an inferiority complex, and to work through the feelings associated with the complex.”

I personally think everyone has felt inferior to their peers. It's a part of life and hey, we're only human! Most cases are usually not all that bad and are cured through time, but there are some cases that can go to the extreme and cause them to be out of balance. Those are the ones that let themselves be consumed with these things they've convinced themselves to be the truth. They become very negative towards most things in life and in return they have negative things happen to them. They also tend to be lost in their own world not realizing that reality is staring them right in the face.

An example of one of the major extremes is this; My friend was watching MTV news and heard that a couple of kids killed themselves because they were gay. Now, when I say kids, I mean they were between the ages of 12 and 15. My guess it that they felt like freaks for liking the same sex, which if you think about it makes total sense because of how people can be SO discriminating towards gays and anyone else who doesn't do things that are the “normal” things to do. I think it's absolutely ridiculous! Those who are so quick to judge others and put them down for being different just don't seem to get it. Just think about it for a second, put yourself in their shoes and think how hard it must be for them and anyone who is considered to be outside of the norm. They get tortured and made fun of because of it. Why can you accept people like Ellen DeGeneres for being gay but no one else?

I've noticed this has become more common in people today. I honestly don't think anyone would really have a problem with all this stuff if more people would just accept others as they are and appreciate the fact that they are able to bring something new to life. There is too much negativity in the world so it goes to show why more and more people are being diagnosed with all of these psychological problems.

Websites used:
http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-an-inferiority-complex.htm

Coral Franzen
October 7, 2010
Psychology

For Kason Bailey, May you rest in peace♥

Yesterday a local highschooler got hit by a car and didn't make it. He was to be eighteen October 24th. Hearing about what happened to Kason Bailey really made me sad. I didn't know him but I know a lot of people who did. I was reading what they all were posting about him on facebook and it made me sad to know that he wasn't ever going to be able to see them, or anyone, again.

Too many of us take the wonderful gift of life for granted. We don't know when we're going to die or how, so why not live like we are? I know a lot of people who have said that if they knew they were going to die in lets say six months, they would do things differently. I've always thought of this to be a funny answer only because we're already dying. Every day that goes by our life gets shorter. Some are going to live longer then others and for those who pass before us it's always a sad story to hear. I personally try to live my life the best way possible. I follow my heart and stay true to who I am. I know life can't last forever, so why pretend like it can?

Reading what my peers have been saying about Kason makes me wish I could've gotten to know him. From what they say he was one heck of an amazing guy. It also makes me wonder what people would say about me. Not to be selfish, but I'm honestly curious. One of my dreams is to make a difference in the world and I wonder if I've done that. Maybe I haven't gotten so far as to making a difference in the whole world, but have I at least made a difference in peoples lives like Kason did?

My heart and my prayers go out to Kason and his family. And to Kason, may you rest in peace. You weren't able to live as long as most of us so I hope that the time you did have on earth was amazing. I didn't know you but I somehow feel connected to you, and you have definitely touched my heart. You've gotten me to make the changes that need to be made in order for me to be better live my life. So I thank you for that. Again, rest in peace. You will be missed greatly♥